Friday, May 22, 2009

Doctor's Appointment

There weren't really any updates to speak of from my doctor's appointment. Emma's heartbeat sounded great and she's growing well. The doctor wants me to have one more ultrasound when I go in for my next appointment in 2 weeks. She says that because of the size of the cyst that it's harder to measure the size of the baby and an ultrasound will solve that problem. I'm hoping to get a solid decision on whether or not they'll induce me early or not because of her size (the doctor mentioned it 2 weeks ago). I'm pretty sure she's grown quite a bit over the last few weeks - I've gotten HUGE. People from work stopped me all day to tell me that I "popped" again and that I looked ready to have her. One teacher even recommended that I go home because I looked like I was about to explode. I certainly feel that way!

I've been having quite a bit of pain from my belly button down this week. After asking several moms that I know and then asking the doctor, I discovered why. Emma's "dropped" as they say. It's not very noticeable to look at my belly, but I can certainly feel all 5lbs of baby on my pelvic bones!

Tomorrow is our childbirth preparation class at Northside. We're looking forward to it, but wishing that it wasn't all day long (9-4). I had the option of doing a weekend class (2 days, 1/2 day each), weekly classes (a few hours a week for several weeks) or doing it all at once and we decided to get it out of the way. On Tuesday night we have our hospital tour. I'm looking forward to that as well. I'm afraid that it may bring on the fears of labor that I'm currently trying very hard to suppress. So long as they can promise to do a "drive thru" epidural as I pull into the parking lot, we'll be all good. ;)

I can't believe that I only have 3 more weeks until I'm full-term, and 42 days until her due date. Time has flown and has dragged on and on and on, all at the same time. We're ready for her, but not nearly ready. Does that make sense?? I've washed her newborn and 3 month clothes, set up her nursery, read books and done internet research on breastfeeding and newborn care. However, there's still a pile of shower gifts on our dining room table to be sorted through and washed, thank you cards to be written and sent, and last minute things to buy at Babies R Us. It makes me wonder if we'll ever feel truly "ready." I feel ready in the sense that we're both fairly prepared to handle a newborn. I know that I will be overwhelmed with lack of sleep and emotions for the first several weeks. I'm aware that our lives will never be the same, and I'm READY for it. Brad on the other hand.... :) He'll get there.

Today was the last day of school for the kids. We still have 2 days of post-planning. I can honestly say that today was cathartic for me. Some teachers are sad when they leave their students, knowing that they aren't coming back. When I left my job in Carrollton I cried like a baby. Today.....nothing. Absolutely nothing. Sure, I will miss a few of my students. In all honesty, this year has been tough. I've had 10 students for most of the year - a HUGE caseload for a special needs classroom. I've dealt with a lot of things at school from my personal life - a lot of ups and downs. Some of my kids were particularly tough - known throughout the department as the class that no one would be caught dead teaching. Think wild monkeys on crack wearing diapers. You can ask Brad if I'm exaggerating - he's seen them. I've also dealt with a tough parent all year that has made me miserable. For some reason, because I can't cure her son's autism I must be the cause of it. I'm just so glad to see the year go by that it's hard to get emotional about it. It's also hard to be sad to leave when I know that the best part of my entire life is waiting for me. I can't wait to hold Emma, make Brad a "daddy," make my parents "grandparents," and get to know my sweet little girl. She's so loved already by so many people that it brings tears to my eyes to even fathom.


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